Just bought more of these tinned sweets for my Dad amongst other things.
This week has been so hard. I cannot really describe it.
My Dad arrived in the care home for 2 weeks’ respite on Monday.
My Mum slipped in the care home and fractured her hip (neck of femur) on Wednesday. She is 91 years old. I was super scared with her having surgery at that age and also being in A & E with her on Wednesday night for 5 hours. She was in so much pain. A & E was so busy. I’d never been to A & E before, it was a horrible experience. I left her at midnight when I could take no more, she was still having investigations, still not in a bed. I sat on a bench outside the hospital, utterly exhausted, I’d worked all day before that and had no dinner. I had a big cry while waiting for David to pick me up. A few people passed me including staff. No one asked if I was OK.
My Mum had her surgery late yesterday. It nearly got cancelled due to admin issues with their new computer system. Thankfully it went ahead and went well. I saw her this morning, a bit spaced out, in pain, but looked probably a bit better than I expected. The physios came to get her moving. I was very impressed with them and so proud of my Mum. A bit confused with her dementia but she was really trying to do as they asked. Frightened, in pain, feeling a bit out of it, but she was doing it. She has never had mobility issues before and wants to run before she can walk or even get out of the bed. Hopefully she will get there, with the right support.
So I am shattered. Again. Hoping for no more dramas over the weekend 🤞🤞🤞Happy weekend all.
The Windsor Waffle 
So sorry to hear of your latest.
A&E no stranger to see me. I have seen it feom my teens and onwards, whether for myself, my mum, or many years ago when I used to work in a care home and had to with that person to A&E on rare occasions.
I can certainly undrstand that worry you had for that age your mum is. But I am glad she is ok after surgery and working on her walking.
I am shocked though that no one asked you how you was when you were in tears. The last time I was at A&E waiting for mum at the main entrance for her to arrive, I had the same staff member check on me and I wasn’t in tears or panicking. It was same staff member who chased up to see if my mum was on her way.
And I had anothet staff member ask if I was ok too on passing.
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Thanks Liz. It was just so busy.. never want to go there again! I think it was also a shock that my Mum suddenly became my responsibility again as next of kin, rather than the care home.
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This is what I have noticed since my mum was in a care home. When she was sent to hospital, they asked if I could meet her there. That surprised me. I had to leave work early.
Yet when I worked in care for a couple of years, care assistant would go. But working in care was many years ago.
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I a so very sorry for you. You are going through an extremely hard time. Virtual hug is the best I can do at the moment. It reminds me of the time I ahd just had a baby, my father was suddently diagnosed with bowel aner and I had just gone back to work. two other children at home. every day was a nightmare. the only way I learnt to copewas to deliberately forget aobut my father and my children when i was in school, about my father and school when I was at home and about school and my family when I was with my father. I led a every compartmentalised lifefor a few weeks which probably had its repercussions, but it is a technique I call on in times of great stress. If i remember!
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Thank you Basia. Your situation sounds so challenging. Well done for surviving that!! I am doing this compartmentalising a bit already. I have a day when I try to focus on my Dad and then a day for my Mum etc. But then someone will ask how my Mum is on my Dad’s day and then I feel guilty and get drawn back into that direction. Also at work I seem to have office hours admin for my parents like phone calls to doctors etc that I end up doing at work instead of my work. My boss told me not to work yesterday and get some rest. So on Monday I want to do a full day’s work for him but already I have at least 3 important day time phone calls on my to do list for my Dad.. I just hope my husband stays OK otherwise that’ll finish me off. Thank you so much for your understanding and your support. I have a lot of good people behind me that hopefully will see me through..
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take as much time off as you can- your workplace sounds understanding.
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